The Onion: Is the Government Spying on Paranoid Schizophrenics Enough?

In The Know: Is The Government Spying On Paranoid Schizophrenics Enough?

I think what would be great would be a recorded voice on a loop, saying "Everyone around you wants to get you." In reference to help.

We already have the ability to make everything that's the color red signal data and images back to the government's underground bunkers and we should be using this technology to help these people.